Slice of Life: Selfie Challenged 3 of 31

For the month of March, I'll be writing with the Slice of Life community.  Disclaimer:  I'll be writing every day so the writing will be raw and a bit messy most days.  Thanks to Two Writing Teachers for bringing this community together and for inspiring me to try to find the stories that surround me each day.  

"Everybody, lean in," I say, trying to find the sweet spot for my camera.

"Wait, I can't see all of you yet," I tell my dad, husband, and nephew, trying to capture the four of us gathered at our favorite weekly hangout.  My husband tries to lean a bit more toward the center of the table.  Nope, I still don't have it.

"Hang on," I follow, trying to get everyone in the camera frame.

"Almost," I add as I try to extend my arm as far as it will reach.  I'm rather tall, but no matter how far I extend my arm I still can't get the four of us in the picture.

I wrestle with the camera and then try to remember which button on the side snaps the picture when you aren't using the screen.  Is it the volume?  The power button?  I give up with a sigh.  Another attempted selfie unsuccessful.

Selfies, I just can't take them.

If you've ever been with me when I try to turn the camera around to take a selfie you know it's true.  It's not really the selfie I'm after, but the "usie" as I heard Katie Keier call them one time.  You know, that delightful group shot where you're holding the phone and all of your friends gather around to get in the picture.  I watch people do it all the time.   They hold out their phone, their friends cluster around them, and bam - a great picture.  Not me.  It's just a skill set I don't possess.

To be fair, I can't even take a true selfie with my phone.  No matter where I hold the camera I can't get the picture right.  Sometimes I'm looking away from the lens so it looks creepy.  Other times, the angle is just awful.  Should I hold the camera high?  Should I hold the camera low?  Do I turn it slightly?

Apparently, the skill isn't naturally acquired for everyone and doesn't run in families.  My daughter can rock a selfie.  She's been doing it for years.  She'll pause in the house, in the car, at dinner, just about anywhere and grab that selfie.  She has a million different facial expressions she uses to take it up a notch.  Honestly, the only good selfies/usies I have on my phone are the ones she took.  When we're out I'll attempt to take a picture of us together; eventually, we end up laughing so hard that I pass the camera to her and she snaps a picture shaking her head at my inability to master this simple skill.

On Facebook and Instagram, I'm always a bit envious of the group photos people have snapped holding their phones in selfie position.  I've seen friends take a selfie of a group gathered around them.  I've seen friends snap a picture where they're in the front and then, at a bit of a distance, the group can be seen in the background of the picture.  Sometimes this is two or three people, but I have a few friends who somehow manage these great shots with groups up to ten.  Really, it's a gift I don't possess.

By now you're probably thinking, "Just buy a selfie stick," but that will never happen.  Those sticks are big and bulky, and would only amplify my problem as I pull it out of my purse.  I guess I'll just continue to hand my phone to some kind some stranger and say, "Do you mind taking a picture of our group for me?"




Comments

  1. Your slice made me laugh! I can't do selfies either. And truthfully, I really don't have any desire to learn. I don't need a million pictures of myself!

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    Replies
    1. I feel the same. I've tried to stay out of photos for years. Why change now.

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  2. Haha! I struggle with selfies too. I have friends who always have to tell me where to look. Love this slice!

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  3. I share your pain- can't do them either (not that I try very often). I also struggle to center myself when I record video on my laptop, so I know it is a distance and perception flaw in me in general. You did a great job describing a common weakness:)

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    Replies
    1. I hadn't thought about the perception side of that. I struggle putting leftovers in the right size bowl. I suppose its possible the two challenges are related.

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  4. This reminds me so much of my mom! She's also selfie-challenged...but I'm a master selfie taker. I think it's the generational gap for her. Keep trying!! :)

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  5. This is so funny, and I could so relate. I make my son take all our selfies/usies. I generally blame it on my short arms, but I don't think long arms would help me much. Glad to know I'm not the only one missing this skill!

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    1. It seems there are several of us. I think we'll still survive.

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  6. As someone who is also selfie challenged, I loved your post! I have even tried the selfie stick, and I still can't get a halfway decent picture!

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    1. I don't think a selfie stick would solve my problem. Maybe I purposely don't learn to take them well. I'm happy to avoid a picture any time.

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  7. I enjoyed your selfie ramblings but really the best part of this post and the three generations picture at the bottom. I can see your mama in both you and your daughter.

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  8. I've attempted selfies before, with results like yours. It seems like it should be so simple, but nope! :-) ~JudyK

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  9. Oh, now this just cracked me up! Too funny, Cathy! I must admit, I cannot take a selfie either ... at least not one that I love. Half the time I end of dropping the phone because I'm trying to extend my arm or turn it to get everyone in the picture. I don't even know that practice will help us at this point ...

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